The Illusion of Control

The illusion of control. 

As you know control is something that I struggle with. I'm always trying to convince myself that I have ALL situations under control. 

Recently, I had come to believe that if I took control of my eating habits I would be able to control my future destiny. By preventing chronic diseases my life would automatically be better. 

Now there is some truth in this, and I still am a proponent of healthy eating, but after experiencing my knee injury while on vacation I realized really how little control I actually had. 

Now of course, questioning whether climbing 105 step without having trained at all for such an endeavor was within my control. Except to be honest, I never even questioned whether to climb or not once out tour guide said go. I just did it. Step by winded step I continued my climb to the top. Stopping along the way to catch my breath, and realizing when I made it to the top I felt a little light headed. 

My instinct was to climb back down, which I immediately did. Half-way to the bottom I began to feel like my old self. The only consequence of the climb was the next day my calves and thighs were sore. 

I just assumed that my over sixty body could easily handle what turned out to be an extreme circumstance. Each step I took literally was a beating for my knee.  Luckily, it was just inflammation from over use, and not something to require surgery. A few days on the couch, and I seemed to be on the mend. 

What I did realize was that as hard as I might try there will always be some unbeknownst circumstance that I will not be able to control. However, I think I'm okay with that.