The Interesting Person

The interesting person. 

One of my favorite commercials is the one about the "Most Interesting Man in the World." His days are spent hanging out with "beautiful" people, and doing totally outrageous things. Compared to HIS life, most of us have an extremely boring life with a capital B.

In The Pursuit of Happiness by Chris Guillebeau he writes about Tina Roth Eisenberg who each week hosts something she calls Creative Mornings which features, "...a talk by an artist or other interesting person."

This got me to thinking about what constitutes being interesting? I'm assuming it has to be totally subjective, as to what I find interesting might not interest you at all. The definition of interesting according to the Oxford Dictionary is, "Arousing curiosity or interest; holding or catching the attention." 

Given the choice I'd much rather aspire to being interesting, and spend time around others whom I consider interesting as well. If truth be told, I seem to find those who think differently than me the most interesting. My fascination with tiny home living, and tattoo shows all stem from trying to figure out the motivations of those unlike me. 

 I can't help but think that your life experiences, your travels, and your knowledge all contribute toward you being an interesting person. That and your receptiveness toward learning new things all help make and keep you interesting. Eisenberg states, "I want to be remembered as a person who wasn't afraid to start things." I have to agree with her mantra. That and of course the mantra of the Most Interesting Man in the World, "Stay thirsty my friends."

Done

Done.  

The other day I began working on a scrapbook that I had started after I retired in 2009. I had been hesitant to even begin when Brittany was younger because scrapbooking had become such an art, and I was concerned that mine would not measure up. Rather than risk an imperfect scrapbook, I dutifully slipped the photos into a less intimidating photo album. 

When I retired, though, I took on the job of Historian for my local retired teacher's organization, and  became responsible for the scrapbook. Using simple layouts, colored cardstock, and a few stickers I produced a pretty good product that captured the events of the year. 

It was this experience that spurred me on to do the same thing with my family photos. Now at the time I definitely under estimated what this would entail. There was well over twenty years of photos, and my efforts started to quickly become tedious. It's not that I minded the walk down memory lane, it was just such a long road, and I found myself losing interest.  Eventually I just put it up convincing myself that someday soon I would return to it. 

Unfortunately, that day never really arrived, except for a few half-hearted attempts along the way that didn't result in much progress. So now eight years into retirement I'm beginning to realize that as far as this scrapbook goes it's now or never. 

So I drug everything out the other day, and set it up on a card table in the guest bedroom. My heart sunk when I opened up the scrapbook, and realized I had only made it to 1997; a full twenty years ago.  Now I suppose the saving grace of this is that my non-digital photos only go to 2005, so I really don't have to tackle a full twenty years. 

I think along with the sheer number of photos, my reluctance to complete this task has to do with the reality that I very well may be wasting my time. As much as I've enjoyed the blast from the past, I'm not sure my whole family feels the same way. Just like my set of china, I'm afraid these scrapbooks may likely find their way into the trashcan after I'm gone. 

In my efforts to convince myself to carry on I decided that maybe if I listened to some podcasts while I was working I could justify the expenditure of time. This way I could listen to something I enjoyed while recording the history of our family.  I also decided to pick up the pace a little bit, and be less concerned about the perfection of the finished product.

I couldn't help but smile the other day when I came across the words of Elizabeth Gilbert, "I don't want it to be perfect. I want it to be finished. Done is better than good." I'm ready to be done. 

Treasure

Treasure. 

Most of the time when we think about treasure we think about currency. A treasure chest full of gold and sparkling diamonds might come to mind. However, our most valuable treasure is the currency of our time, and yet we more times than not allow it to slip through our fingers like coins falling on to the sidewalk. 

Author Elizabeth Gilbert realizes the value of  time, and the resource that it really is. She confesses, "...the single most precious resource that I possess, the one currency that can never be restored once it's spent, is my time...I know that this is my treasure."

Having time is kind of like being the son or daughter of a billionaire, you know a trust fund baby. Because it has been handed to you so freely over the years, and you haven't had to work for it, you don't take it too seriously. It's freely spent, never really being accounted for because you just assume it will always be there.  

If time is my treasure than maybe I should treat it with more reverence?  Time is kind of like fossil fuels, a non-renewable resource. Those dinosaurs are not coming back, and neither is your time. Just as wasteful is to spend too much time stuck in the past. Reminiscing every now and then is fine, but putting your efforts into the time you have today is a much better use of your treasure. 

Gilbert also reminds us, "I know that my time , and my minutes on this earth are numbered, and I don't know when that number is up." She and my beloved high school principal W.P. Durrett, who would remind us daily that, "It was later than you think," are both reminders of the reality of this. Although to be honest, as high school seniors we really had no idea what Mr. Durrett was talking about, and brushed it off as not important. Now we are kindred spirits!  It's amazing what forty-three years will do for you. 

So each morning as you awake to take possession once again of your treasure make sure that you appreciate its value. 

Overthinking

Overthinking. 

I'm a victim of overthinking. Just like clockwork anytime I am presented with a decision, small or large I begin to overthink. Nine times out of ten I can talk myself out of something right away. "What was I thinking?" "I couldn't possibly do that."

If I'm not talking myself out of something, I'm usually trying to figure out five steps ahead, just as I did every day in the classroom for thirty-one years. This is such an automatic response that most of the time I'm really not even aware I'm doing it. 

This practice can actually be quite exhausting, and I find my mind rarely settles. That's probably why I have been known to talk in my sleep, needing the full twenty-four hours to figure things out.  I always seem to be thinking about the next thing, along with the current thing, the past thing, and maybe even the thing that's going to happen next week. It wears me out just thinking about it. 

I know this overthinking cannot be good. Perhaps some sort of breathing technique, or meditation or prayer might result in a more centered me? Once again this boils down to the whole idea of accepting your nature, but at the same time challenging yourself to do better. 

I think the next time I find myself doing this I will simply say, "Stop." This reaction has worked in the past when my thoughts seem to take on a mind of their own. One thing at a time, one thing at a time. 

That Old Friend Fear

That old friend fear.

In our attempts to avoid fear, run from fear, and hide from fear we might actually be doing ourselves a disservice. Author Elizabeth Gilbert has a different take on fear. In fact she states, "I have no desire to become a fearless person." 

She believes that fear plays an important role in our survival, and yet she has learned to thank fear for its concern, and send it on its way if it is not needed. She also states that when it comes to creativity, fear seems especially interested. "Creativity will always provoke fear because it asks you to enter into a realm with an uncertain outcome, and fear hates that."

Gilbert cautions us to not let fear have control because it will "shut down one idea after another-nope too risky." Because fear is an uncomfortable emotion we often times do our best to avoid it or push through it. I think we shouldn't be afraid of fear. Rather than pushing it aside or allowing it to paralyze us we should as Gilbert says just acknowledge it, and decide if it is warranted or not?

Gilbert also points out that if you don't befriend your fear, "Your life will be so much smaller than you want it to be." 

Life Experiments

Life experiments. 

The idea of life experiments can be credited to Allan Bacon, a man who was looking for more adventure in his everyday life. These experiments may have been as simple as visiting an art museum, but their impact resulted in him "working from home" in Paris with his family. 

He too remembered a childhood full of adventure where you just went ahead and did something, rather than spend your time contemplating whether you were qualified or not?

Including these small "experiments" in his life contributed to a whole new attitude. When contemplating a career move he realized that all that was available to him were career inventories that focused on what he had done in past jobs. 

To him this was, "...the equivalent of trying to decide whether I would like mango ice cream by analyzing my past food choices." How can we really know for sure without actually tasting mango ice cream?

How true this seems to be in life when we plan for our future based on our past. How do we know if we'd enjoy vacationing at a Dude Ranch if we've never tried it? How do we know what genre we might like if we've always read the same type of book? As we limit our possibilities we might be missing out on the greatest thing since sliced bread. 

I think including our own "life experiments" in our daily life just might contribute to a more adventure.

Do One Thing

Do one thing.  

Eleanor Roosevelt is credited with saying, "Do one thing each day that scares you."

These days just getting out in traffic seems to be the scariest thing I do. Why would Eleanor challenge us to do scary things?

Perhaps because she knew that if we wanted to lead a life of adventure, we would have to face being scared.  Chris Guillebeau states in his book, The Happiness of Pursuit, "If you want to make every day an adventure, all you have to do is prioritize adventure."

In prioritizing adventure we make it important. We make time for it, save for it, and long for it. As a child each new day was a new adventure for me. Even a simple walk home from school might end up with me going a different way just to make it interesting. In my constant quest for knowledge you might find me reading a book about King Arthur, collecting toads in a terrarium for the summer, or bringing home a chemistry book to create a new invention in a Dixie cup. I can remember rock hunting, creating puppets for a puppet show or choreographing a ballet for my neighborhood girlfriends, even though I'd never taken a lesson in my life. 

Childhood for me was one adventure after another. I was either exploring the forests of Germany, ice skating in New York or swimming in Florida. I really didn't think twice about trying something new. Predictably, though, once I entered adolescence that spirit of adventure began to fade as I worried too much about what other people thought of me, whether I'd ever be popular or if some boy might like me?  More and more I lost that sense of self and conformed to those around me. 

Fast forward about forty-five years, and I find myself longing for that adventurous little girl again. The one who woke each morning ready to take on the day. The one who didn't let not knowing hold her back. The one who saw possibilities and fun around every corner. 

Maybe setting Eleanor Roosevelt's goal of doing one thing each day that you are uncertain of, frightened by, or uncomfortable with might open up the door to adventure?

Old Ways

Old ways. 

"Old ways won't open new doors." This hit me like a ton of bricks. Especially for where I am today in my life; wanting to open new doors, but still clinging to my old ways. 

In the book, Eat, Pray, Love Made Me Do It, Emily Shaules shares her story of how she completely transformed her life and her health, and in the process created her energy bar business, Shift Bars. Shaules had been compliantly following the predetermined path that society often paints, and in her quest for perfectionism she found herself gravely ill. 

As I contemplated how this applied to my life, it became apparent that in the past I've pretty much stuck to the old tried and true ways. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but now that I'm moving into a new phase of the journey I'm ready to embrace new ways of thought that might foster growth, and not cling so tightly to what I've always done.  

When Shaules admitted that the life she was leading was not really what she wanted she was able to make the changes she needed, and restored not only her mental health, but her physical health as well. So how do you begin to learn some new ways? Maybe just being more open to the possibilities is a start. Also, being a little more mindful as you go through your day, and challenging yourself to think differently. 

Start

Start. 

I'm reading a whimsical book by Jill Badonsky entitled, The Muse is In: An Owner's Manual to Your Creativity. She writes, "You get more done when you start things than when you don't."

I have found that the starting point has always been a challenge for me. Interestingly enough though, most of the time once I start something, even something new, I generally have some level of success. 

I think more than anything I find myself  hesitant to start things I don't really know how to do. I've always been uneasy about asking for help, and this has more to do with possibly coming off as stupid more than anything else. By putting it off I don't have to risk this happening. So as obvious as it may sound starting really is the key. 

Some people accomplish more if they jump in with both feet, while some do better to dip a toe in the water, and wade in slowly. Sometimes it has more to do with the task at hand. When we began decluttering our home before the move, I found the cannonball method to be the most efficient. If I had dragged it out over a long period of time I'm afraid I might still be there. 

However, sometimes it's easy to get overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of a task. Maybe then it's better to use the How to Eat an Elephant rule: One bite at a time. By taking small steps toward a goal you can build up your confidence, and perhaps have a better chance of it coming to fruition. 

Either way the important thing is that you just have to start. 

The Idea

The idea. 

Has this ever happened to you? You have an idea, a really amazing IDEA, and you can hardly stop thinking about it. It sounds so wonderful, and the possibilities seem endless. You start to get really excited about it. Why that idea might just change your life. 

Except, that when you really start thinking about that idea you begin to change your mind.  The logistics, and the realities, and the risks involved all seem to cause that idea  to begin to shrink away.  After a while you forget about it completely. Or so you try to convince your self. Why you are much better off without that crazy, old idea. Once again practicality wins out. 

However, my experience has been that those ideas really don't leave you. They tuck themselves away, and remain very quiet and very small until they don't. For whatever reason you might find that idea making its presence known again. Ideas can be very persistent, and very patient. 

As a writer, author T.S. Elliott knew about ideas. In fact, he stated it very clearly when he wrote, "Between the idea and the reality...falls the shadow." I seem to live a lot of my life in the shadow talking myself out of the idea. 

However, as hard as I try the idea seems to keep resurfacing. Maybe it's time to listen. 

The Timeline

The timeline. 

When you are a child you like to brag to your friends about living to be one hundred. Of course, very few people do, and the reality is that life at one hundred might not be all that great. 

Of course, there are those exceptions. The woman who still teaches yoga, the man  competing in the Senior Olympics, and the artist painting every day. If I live to one hundred I hope I'm one of those. Except I don't do yoga, run or paint. Maybe I need to get started!

Chances are most of us will live to be a little bit more or a little bit less than eighty. The other day I saw a simple graphic that kind of put everything into perspective. It was a hand drawn timeline divided into eight sections of ten representing birth through eighty. The creator,  Unkle Adams, premise was that we spend the majority of our lives working, and that it made sense to be doing something you enjoyed. 

I couldn't help but focus on the end of the timeline because that was where my age fell. One thing you learn as you get older is that time really does fly. But unlike the old adage it is going to fly regardless of whether you're having fun or not. 

I can't say that every moment of my remaining days are going to be noteworthy. In fact, many of them are probably going to be rather ordinary. But, if the overall gist of the decade has been rewarding I'll have lived a good life. 

What the graphic did do was remind me not to put off too many things that I've dreamed of doing. As much as I aspire to be that rare centenarian, I know through experience that we don't always get to orchestrate the way those golden years play out. Being cognizant of that, might change the way we view our place on the timeline today. 

Uncomfortable

Uncomfortable.

There are certain things in life that make me feel uncomfortable. I suppose this is true to some degree for everyone. Except, there are times where we just have to step up to the plate and make the best of an uncomfortable situation. 

For me things like crowds, disorder, feeling left out, and being out of control are all things that cause  me some level of distress. That and airports. Even long before the TSA I always had some anxiety about the whole airport experience. Now I've flown many times, and I'm actually pretty okay about the flight itself. I think it has more to do with being late, and missing my flight.

On the flip side I'm very comfortable with things that many are not. I have no trouble public speaking, and in fact I kind of like it. I'm perfectly fine going to the movies, and eating out alone. I'm rarely concerned about getting lost, because I have a good sense of direction. In addition I'm comfortable talking to people I don't know, and enjoy speaking my mind in a group setting.

It got me to thinking about how best to react in situations where you feel uncomfortable, especially when leaving is really not an option. I've written quite a bit about comfort zones, and the benefits of pushing out of them. 

Author, Gretchen Rubin includes in her Secrets of Adulthood the idea to "Accept yourself, and expect more of yourself." In other words even though it is a strength to know your weaknesses it doesn't mean it gives you a free pass to give up. 

Sometimes it's good to find that middle ground between comfort and discomfort. I think if possible having a game plan is not a bad idea, especially if you know ahead of time that you are going to be in an uncomfortable setting. 

Other times, I suppose you just have do the best you can, and chalk it up to being perfectly human. 

Yield or Accelerate?

Yield or accelerate?

Each weekday morning I drop Chuck off at the train station. As I leave I have to enter the highway next to the train station. 

This sometimes requires me to yield to the ongoing traffic without the benefit of a merge lane. This can be tricky at times depending on the flow of traffic. Each morning I have to make a judgement call about whether I should slow down or speed up to get ahead of the oncoming cars. 

Now my naturally cautious nature wants me to slow down and yield. Except that because there is no merging lane trying to accelerate from a complete stop is not always wise. Sometimes the best thing to do is to speed up.

The other morning as I did so, it made me realize that speeding up goes against my nature. I'd rather come to a complete stop, and wait until there is no possible risk involved. 

Except the truth is that you really can't live a risk-free life. Now of course, I'm not talking about reckless driving here, it's just that sometimes pushing yourself out of your comfort zone is the better way. 

Right at Home

Right at home. 

Earlier this week I accompanied my neighbor to volunteer at a local Memory Care facility close to our apartments.  I was able to assist in the making of Mother's Day pins that were glittery, and bejeweled, and turned out quite nicely. 

Two years ago if you had asked me to visit, I would have felt very uncomfortable. Kind of like a duck out of water. Except, what have I been doing for the last two years, but visiting my Dad    at his Memory Care home. 

When I walked up to the front door I had a little lump in my throat as I thought about my Dad. I realized that I was missing not only him, but the familiar routine of stopping by for a visit. 

As I helped out where I could I saw the same familiar kindness and love from the caretakers toward the residents. It was a happy place where each person was still viewed as valuable. I found myself fitting in right away, and enjoyed the time I spent there. 

I can easily see myself, and Cooper as well, visiting each week, and helping out with special projects. I made sure to thank my neighbor for encouraging me, and inviting me to tag along. 

There is nothing wrong with a little kick in the pants to get you involved with something really worthwhile. 

Partners in Crime

Partners in crime. 

I've written about him before, and no, besides the tennis ball incident, we pretty much try to not break the law, but Cooper and I are basically inseparable. I've used the word devoted before, and it really suits him. 

Whenever it's possible I try to bring Cooper along for the ride. Although, I can honestly say we haven't crossed over to the Giggy and Ken level on the Housewives yet.  You won't find Cooper drinking from my champagne flute. Heck, you probably won't find me drinking from a champagne flute! 

However, Cooper does accompany me every morning when we drop Chuck off at the train station. If I need to make more than one trip to the parking garage to haul groceries he's there. He accompanies me to take out the trash, check the mail, and of course his infamous "taking care of business" aka potty breaks in the courtyard. 

We try to make a walk along the lake a part of our daily routine, and if it's early enough, and not too crowded, a trip to the dog park to chase his beloved tennis ball. On special occasions we'll travel to Petco to peruse the Treat Bar, and our trips to the farm always include him.

Most of the time, though, you will find him relaxing on the bed waiting for me to get ready, nestled beside me on the couch, and sometimes on my shoulder if I'm in a reclined position. Wherever I am is exactly where he wants to be. 

Now Cooper really is a friendly guy, and much prefers the company of people to dogs at the dog park. I'm hoping our next adventure is a trip to visit the residents at a local Memory Care facility around the corner. Cooper used to always get a kick out of visiting Dad, and I'm hoping he has an opportunity to accompany me there soon. 

So although we are not really on a crime spree, we sure do spend a lot of time together. And the old adage of a dog being man's or should I say woman's best friend works for me. 

All or Nothing Thinking

All or nothing thinking. 

This describes me pretty accurately. Either I'm all in, almost compulsively, or I'm all out. For me there really is very little in-between.

I set very high or unrealistic standards that eventually I can't meet, and then beat myself up about why I haven't met or maintained my goal. My answer to this is usually to just give up, live in the land of denial, or secretly "hate" myself for not being perfect. 

This all or nothing thinking does get in the way.  Rather than be so hard on myself, I need to allow for a little more grace, and not demand an impossible standard.

Sometimes in the process of working toward a goal life happens, and other things take priority. Stress has a way of doing that, and distracting you from what really matters. During these times you might just find yourself functioning in survival mode. 

Starting today I'm going to extend a little more kindness, and not be so hard on myself. I'm kicking "all or nothing" to the curb.

Saying Hello

Saying hello.

I'm making a point to saying hello to the people I meet at my apartments. What I'm finding is that this gesture is not only a friendly thing to do, but it has been opening doors to new opportunities. 

My neighbor around the corner has a little dog that she brings to a Memory Care facility not far from us. She has recruited me to do the same with Cooper. We have plans on Wednesday to tour the facility and meet the activity director. To be honest two years ago I might have been hesitant to volunteer because I would have felt uncomfortable, but I've spend the last two years visiting Dad at his Memory Care residence, and I feel right at home.

The other day I was walking back from the dog park with Cooper, and stopped to speak with a young woman who was taking photographs of the lake. Come to find out she was a blogger too, and after looking up her fitness blog I learned she was a lifetime member of Weight Watchers as well. I had already considered returning to meetings, and had found a new Weight Watcher location in the area. She was just the motivation I needed to get back on track. 

I think about how I would have missed out on two wonderful opportunities if I had not stopped to say hello. Doors will open if you allow them. 

All-in

All-in.

In reading The Happiness of Pursuit by Chris Guillebeau, he writes about a young woman named Meghan Baker who passed away in her twenties from breast cancer. 

As tragic as it was, in relaying her story he wrote, "She always went all-in on everything she did. She didn't save anything for later." Prior to her diagnosis Meghan had lived a "bucket list" type of life. After her death, her husband took it upon himself to complete that list in her honor. 

It seems that often times we hear about people like Meghan who seem to live more life in the short time they are given than most do in a lifetime. 

What I found inspiring about her attitude, though, was her not saving anything for later. Always waiting for that perfect moment might just result in completely missing the boat. 

I also admired the way she would go all-in. How fortunate she was that this quality was something she possessed even before her illness. I have a tendency to hold back, to approach situations more with caution, and to not allow myself to enjoy things fully. 

I remember once feeding some seagulls in Mississippi while visiting my Dad and step-mother. As I threw Doritos overhead, they swooped down encircling me, and I couldn't help but laugh with abandonment. The feeling was completely freeing and exhilarating. Most of the time I hold myself back in reserve making sure that I come across as controlled at all times. I wouldn't want to embarrass myself, would I? 

Although, Meghan's life was shorter than most her legacy remains in reminding us how to live life no matter how many days we are given. 

Possibilities

Possibilities. 

Chris Guillebeau, author of, The Happiness of Pursuit, writes, "In a world where so much is possible..." This got me to thinking about how there really is an abundance of possibilities before us. 

However, why  is it so easy to lose sight of the many different options that we have? As children our future is nothing but possibilities. Over time why do we narrow them down, and seem satisfied to only consider a few? 

Why are we hesitant to explore possibilities? In fact, if you are like me, you might even struggle to make a list. Is it fear of failure or more just not wanting to put in the hard work it might require?

Maybe life has become a little too comfortable in retirement? Without school or a job to hold my feet to the fire it's been easy to let go of the discipline that might be needed to accomplish some of those possibilities.

So where to go from here? Perhaps a list of possible options to begin with, and not being reluctant to put in the work that those possibilities might entail.

Discontent

Discontent. 

Thomas A. Edison said, "Discontent is the first necessity of progress" In his book, The Happiness of Pursuit, Chris Guillebeau points out, "When discontent sets in, its time to make some changes."

This got me to thinking about the changes we have made recently, and were they based on discontent? If you were to ask me why we moved I could have given you a whole litany of reasons; closer to Chuck's work, a too big house, less responsibility all seemed valid reasons to sell the house.  

Except, if the truth be known, I think it had more to do with discontent.  Each time we ventured out into our community we found ourselves increasingly aggravated with the traffic. What used to take twenty minutes now took forty-five when retrieving a pizza from the west side of town. 

Our little neighborhood which had once been tucked away from all the hustle and bustle was being encroached upon by three massive apartment buildings, a new neighborhood and a huge grocery store. It just didn't feel like home any more. 

In addition, our aging home seemed quite content to demand any extra money we might have, and to be honest the lightning strike last fall, pretty much sealed the deal. 

I guess what I'm saying is that even though for several years we had kicked around the idea of downsizing, it wasn't until our discontent started to show that we seriously entertained the idea of change. 

Maybe, discontent is nature's way of having you take a second look at your life, and giving you the kick in the pants you might need to move forward. 

Encyclopedia Britannica

Encyclopedia Britannica.

When I was around seven my family invested in two sets of Encyclopedia Britannica; both the grown-up version and the junior version. Today encyclopedias seem to be a thing of the past, but I tell you I loved that Junior Encyclopedia Britannica.

During my third grade year one of my favorite pastimes was doing extra credit reports for school. I know this screams NERD, but luckily that word was unheard of back then. I'm thinking they never covered the topic of plagiarism in third grade because my reports were all copied word for word from that golden volume of knowledge. 

Now the crazy thing is, that I still have possession of those treasured reports. After writing them I would fold a piece of construction paper in half, and make a cover for each. I find it interesting what I chose to report on back then; sweet potatoes, kelp, snakes, Aztecs, and North Carolina. 

I'm not exactly sure what caught my eye about the state of North Carolina, except that I had never been there. I remember being quite fascinated by the little natural resource symbols on the maps provided for each state. It was during this time period that I first researched the term conservation, so apparently I must have been an environmentalist as well at this age. 

A few years after Chuck and I got married I insisted on us purchasing a set of World Book Encyclopedias, which I still own to this day. I have these visions of perusing through them with my grandchildren. 

It's because of my love of encyclopedias that I fully understand my affinity for the i pad.  It's my hands-on, miniature set of encyclopedias always ready to quench my apparent need to know. 

Interestingly enough, I've just realized that my daughter's name sure looks a lot like the name of my favorite encyclopedia. Must have been one of those subliminal things!

Enneagram

Enneagram. 

I've always been fascinated by personality tests. Maybe I should be more honest and admit that my fascination actually borders on compulsion. I'm not sure why, but I seem to struggle when it comes to identifying my type. 

I picked up a book at the library last week about the enneagram, and went right to work trying to figure myself out. It didn't take long for me to narrow it down to one, but then found myself questioning whether it was accurate? Before the day was through I'd tried on a couple more for size. Heck, before it was said and done I'd even figured out Chuck.

Except, I never did quite feel certain that I'd picked the right one for me, so I considered a fourth choice which seemed like it might fit. After investigating further, and determining it was me I found myself in a deep funk, because I really didn't like that type, and found myself depressed over my choice. 

The next morning I took an on-line Enneagram test, and guess what? Apparently my first choice was my type after all! My spirits immediately lifted because I felt so at home with who I was, and really liked what it said about me. 

Except, I'm not sure I read anywhere that my type is CRAZY, considering what I'd just put myself through for the past few days.  I'm thinking figuring out the enneagram might be above my pay grade. 

Ritual

Ritual.

Although, the word ritual many times is defined through the lense of religion, it 

also can have a secular side. Its definition being, "an act or series of acts regularly repeated in a set precise manner."




In her book, How to Celebrate Everything, Jenny Rosenstrach lauds the importance of rituals in our lives. She states, "They bring comfort, connection, and meaning to our days, days that might otherwise just wind up blurring together."

What is it about children, and how they naturally bring ritual to our lives? When my daughter was young our lives were full of rituals. One school year we rode our bicycles to school each Friday. Another year we stopped for breakfast before school on Fridays. Our ritual gave us something to look forward to, and to celebrate each week. Of course, holidays are the easiest time to practice rituals as family traditions are passed down from one generation to the next. 

One thing I've noticed in my empty nester stage of life is that it doesn't include many rituals. Each day passes into the next, and even though that is not necessarily a bad thing, it makes me wonder if it would be richer with a few more rituals thrown in?

Rosenstrach's book shows how easily food can play into family rituals, and that
may be a starting point. However, her ideas are really food for thought when it comes to the possibilities of adding rituals to your life.