“We can change our lives without changing ourselves.”
When I was thirteen, I came across a book at the library titled A New You. For the next few years, I checked that book out continually, hoping to become a new me.
What I didn't know then, and barely know now at times, is that there really isn't anything intrinsically wrong with me. I didn't need to be a new me; I just needed to be me.
Thirteen is a hard age, as you begin falling into the comparison trap. Each new acne breakout only confirms what you know to be true. You aren't good enough in the eyes of the popular girls.
As the years have ticked by, I've realized that when considering the changes we want to make, we need to take our own temperament into account.
Rubin’s book, The Four Tendencies, helps us to identify our natural way of doing things. She explains that by using techniques geared toward our specific type, we have a better chance of meeting our goals.
It's best to embrace your natural self and, like Rubin says, “Be Gretchen.” I remind myself to “Be Shari” often and have stopped making excuses for who I am.
I encourage you to do the same.
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