You Don’t See What You Don’t Look For

The other day on our community Facebook page it was announced that the town car wash had reopened. I didn’t even know we had a car wash, and asked where it was located. 

Apparently, it was behind the Dairy Queen. I had passed by the Dairy Queen hundreds of times since I moved here almost four years ago, and had never noticed the car wash. 

The next time I made my way to town I looked toward the Dairy Queen, and sure enough there was the car wash tucked behind. It had been there the whole time, but I had never looked for it. 

As I thought about it, I wondered how many other things I had missed out on simply by not looking? I consider myself a curious person, but I do know that I can fall into autopilot in my day to day life. 

For me it’s easier to shop at Walmart than H‑E‑B because I’m already familiar with Walmart. That being said, in an attempt to make some different food choices I intentionally shopped at H‑E‑B this last week. 

What I discovered was that I began looking at products in a different way. There were many options I had not tried before. I had found myself returning each week to the same foods, and I was totally bored with eating. 

As a result I kept returning to the pantry to find something that might satisfy my cravings. And sadly that was rarely an apple. 

I decided I need to start looking for something new and the different. I need to discover novelty, and let go of the all too familiar. I learned through this one small incident that, “You don’t see what you don’t look for.”

Ichigo Ichie

 My fascination with Japanese culture and philosophy has me on the hunt for books about Japan. Recently I finished reading The Book of Ichigo Ichie-The Art of Making the Most of Every Moment, the Japanese Way, by Héctor Garcia and Frances Miralles.

The actual translation of Ichigo ichie is either, “Once a meeting,” or “In this moment an opportunity.”

Basically this idea has to do with fully living in the moment. All the while knowing that this moment will never come again. If we allow ourselves to be distracted, “…the moment will be lost forever.”

My Ichigo ichie moment recently has been the budding of our redbud tree. Each year as spring arrives I await the first blooms that signal that spring has arrived. We were unaware of our redbud tree at first, as we moved onto our property in the summer, and the tree blended in with the others. However, We were thrilled the next year to see it peeking out among the other unadorned branches.

What I do know, though, is that it won’t be here for long so I always take a moment to notice it as I travel down our county road. Ichigo ichie reminds me to enjoy the moment, knowing it will not last forever. 

The lesson here is not to get too caught up in the busyness of life to unintentionally miss out on this once in a moment opportunity.

Phil and Rita

 Eight years ago in February my dad passed away. Because he was being buried at the National Cemetery we had to wait about a week before we could have his funeral. One day as I was returning my books to the library, I  noticed a dove sitting on the sidewalk right in front of me blocking my way. 

I paused for a moment, and thought about how some people believe that cardinals are representations of loved ones no longer with us. Obviously this wasn’t a cardinal, but could a dove represent the same thing?

What I did know was that my father loved the library. In fact I credit my love of books and the library to him. I even remember learning how to drive on our trek to the library each Saturday. Could it be that my dad was meeting me at our favorite place one more time? 

I loved the sentiment of it, but my rational mind blew it off as just a coincidence. Even though, I’d never seen a dove at the library before, and what were the chances that it would be sitting there blocking my path?

After that I’d keep my eye out for doves. A few years later at our home in Euless I noticed a reoccurring situation. Two doves would regularly come and sit on my fence looking into my kitchen window. Up until that point I hadn’t noticed any doves in the area. I began referring to them as Phil and Rita, my parents’ names, and looked forward to seeing them each time they came to visit. 

When we moved to our home in the country every now and then I’d see two doves on our county road as I approached our gate. However, what I did notice happening more often than not were two doves that hung around my daughter’s house. When I would be outside with my youngest grandson they always seemed to be perched on the electrical wire as if they were watching us. 

I pointed them out to my grandson, and called them by name. I noticed that when he saw them he’d say, “Mimi there’s Phil and Rita!” It always brought a smile to my face considering the possibility that my beloved parents might be checking in on their great grandson.

The other day when we stepped outside so he could ride his bike, I noticed Phil and Rita were perched on the gate over near the horse pen. I said, “ Look Levi, there’s Phil and Rita, my mom and dad!” 

Levi looked at me quite perplexed with his head cocked to one side, and remarked, “Mimi, you were a bird?” His confusion and sincerity was so genuine. 

I couldn’t help but laugh! How do you explain to a three year old the idea of two birds traveling down from heaven to check on you. No buddy I never was a bird, but maybe just a little bit crazy!

The joy this boy brings me, and the fact that Phil and Rita make regular appearances sure makes life sweet!

Take a Different Route

 I remember when I was in second grade living in Kansas I decided to take a different route home from school. I felt very brave, and adventurous as I took off by myself. I passed by a hospital that I didn’t know existed. I made it home as I’ve always seemed to have a built in navigational system in my brain. Of course, I’m not quite sure about the safety of a seven year old girl taking off by herself on a new, untraveled route. However, it was the early 60’s and children roaming free was commonplace. 

The idea of taking a different route is something author, Gretchen Rubin, promotes:

“When we follow the same path over and over it’s natural to start traveling on autopilot.” 

It’s easy to get comfortable with what is familiar, but over time our lives can begin to feel a little stale. Taking a different route can add a layer of novelty to our once predictable life. 

Interestingly even sixty years later I find myself looking for new and different routes. Trying a new route helps you to discover new places, and  keeps life interesting. 

Even changing the direction of how you normally grocery shop can shake things up just a little. Who knows what new product you might stumble across while navigating the store in a different way? 

I encourage you to take that different route. 

Ten Year Anniversary

 Ten years ago today on January 30, 2015 I wrote and posted my first blog post. I had wanted to start a blog for many years, but was hesitant to do so. I really didn’t know how to set one up, and I never could settle on a name for the blog. As of today this is my 1,824th post. 

As I look back, I can’t tell you exactly what motivated me to post on that first day. I think maybe when Grace Found Daily as a name came to me I knew it was time to start. 

Initially I only sent the blog out to a few high school friends, but it wasn’t long before I posted it to Facebook. I will admit there was a lot of trepidation in doing so. How would it be retrieved, and what would others think? However, it was such a great creative outlet I felt that I really couldn’t not take the chance to do so. 

The first four years I tried to write five days a week. It was a challenge, but I enjoyed how it made me more aware of my world. I was always on the lookout for a blog post, and it kept me creatively sharp. 

I slowed down a little bit that fifth year, and only posted 67 times in the year 2020. That was the year of the pandemic, and because our lives changed so drastically that year I found coming up with new content almost impossible. I wrote a lot about healthy eating that year. 

I pushed myself to return to more consistent writing the next year, but have found the last several years to be a little hit and miss. The motivation I once had has definitely waned, but I’m so happy I never gave up completely.

My blog has been a record of the last ten years of my life. I’ve watch three grandsons grow up, I’ve moved three times to three different communities, and I’ve tried to share an encouraging word about the different phases of life that we all go through. We are all in this big, beautiful life together!

I’ve written eight 31 Days Writing Challenges in the month of October. Each time I’ve delved deep into one subject, and have written it as an encouragement to others. I encourage you to go back and check these out. I’ve written about discovery, change, virtues, creativity(more than once), habits, curiosity, and the Japanese philosophy of Wabi Sabi.

I’ve shied away from controversial subjects like religion and politics, and have focused more on what I things brings us together rather than divides us. I’ve always wanted my blog to be uplifting, and more inspirational and encouraging.

I’ve not always posted everything to Facebook, and I will be honest sometimes I’m hesitant to share because the vulnerability involved in placing yourself out for public consumption can be a little unsettling. However, my readers are very supportive, and seem to cheer me on in my efforts. I hope in sharing that I can inspire or encourage someone else to embrace the changes that life brings, or give someone a different point of view that might be helpful. 

I’ve always enjoyed writing, and began doing so in my childhood. I still have some of my early writing attempts. I journaled throughout my twenties, and have found my blog to be an extension of journaling as well as a creative outlet. 

If you’ve followed along for the last ten years or are new to the blog I want to thank you for bringing a part of my life. I love the interaction we can have through the comments, and have learned so much from you my readers. 

So here’s to another ten years. I can’t wait to see where it takes me!

Fall in Love With the Process

 The other day I dropped off about twenty fully colored coloring books at my local recycling center. It seemed kind of a shame throwing them away, but they had sat on a shelf for the last several years taking up valuable space. 

I really wasn’t sure what else to do with them. Each picture was not anything spectacular and didn’t seem frame worthy. As I pulled away from the center I realized how much fun I had coloring them. It was the process, not the end result that was the most important. 

As a child coloring was always one of my favorite things to do. I remember outlining each subject first, and then lightly filling them in with my crayons. I was always on board anytime a neighborhood friend suggested a coloring contest. I was a good at coloring, and found great pleasure in doing so. 

Perhaps some of this might have been due to not being a natural at drawing. I have since learned that drawing is a skill, and if I had developed it I would have been better at drawing, and probably would have felt more confident doing so. 

However, what I have learned about my personality is that when it’s hard to do, and not much fun I really don’t have the desire to continue. This was true then and true today. I’ll keep you updated on my Wooble’s project at a later date. 

Yesterday I was listening to one of my favorite podcasts, House of Joy featuring Dr. Edie Wadsworth. Dr. Eddie is a trained medical doctor who has left the profession to focus on personal growth coaching for women over forty. 

She and her twenty something daughter were discussing the idea of falling in love with the process vs overemphasizing the end result. Rather than battle with the number on the scale every morning fall in love with trying a new healthy meal each week to add to your repertoire. Fall in love with listening to podcasts while you take your daily walk. Fall in love with the relaxing motion of coloring as you watch your favorite show at night. 

We are definitely a results oriented society, and there really isn’t anything wrong with that. Think of all the amazing inventions over the years. However, if you judge what you do only by the result you may find yourself disappointed.

One bit of advice I’ve clung to since retirement are the words of Happiness Project author, Gretchen Rubin. “You can choose what you do, but you can’t choose what you like to do.” Find the things you like to do, and fall in love with the process of doing so. 

New Normal

 

“When we age our abilities certainly begin to change, but our desires begin to change also.” Joyce Meyers

I recently finished reading How to Age Without Getting Old by Joyce Meyers. One of the points she made in her book had to do with establishing a new normal during different seasons of our life. 

This is especially true as we age. It’s easy to cling to what we’ve always known and done, but in the process we might find that we can’t quite keep up. 

It’s easy to be down on ourselves, and even beat ourselves up as we begin to experience a new normal which doesn’t seem so normal or familiar anymore. 

One of the other things I’ve noticed is that things I once enjoyed doing no longer seem to hold their allure anymore. Some of this might be due to actual physical or cognitive reasons, but regardless I just don’t seem drawn to them anymore. 

However, I keep find myself returning to them mainly out of habit, when perhaps I might need to focus more on the things I really do enjoy. Some of them are no different from twenty years ago, and some are completely new desires and interests. 

I remember reading a book by choreographer, Twyla Tharp, who pointed out that often times as we age our world becomes smaller. This may be due to an innate sense of self-protection knowing that our bodies aren’t quite what they once were.

However, Tharp was insistent that we should push ourselves to live the bigger life instead. What I’ve come to understand is that that bigger life might look completely different than it used to, and that’s okay. 

So today I’m not going to beat myself up for not quite being so on top of everything, and for having different interests from years past. Being hard on yourself really is counterproductive. 

As I reflect on my new normal I must admit that it’s actually quite good, and with the right frame of mind I intend to enjoy this season, and face the next one when it comes. 

Electric Pencil Sharpener

 

As a retired elementary school teacher I have had plenty of experience with hand crank pencil sharpeners. I can remember near blister status at the beginning of each school year as 22 pencils needed to be sharpened in a timely fashion. 

I remember having to contact the custodian for a replacement sharpener when someone had the bright idea to sharpen their crayons. 

As I neared the end of my career I invested in an electric pencil sharpener which I kept at my desk with strict orders that it not be touched by anyone but me. 

That is until Meet the Teacher Night where someone thought it was perfectly appropriate to sharpen their pencils using the teacher’s electric pencil sharpener on her desk. 

The sharpener was never the same, and I’m pretty sure one of the parents was in on the action. So much for boundaries. 

That all being said, over the years of retirement I’ve settled on using a small hand held plastic pencil sharpener to sharpen my pencils. This was never really a problem until I started coloring nightly, which is one of my favorite things to do. 

Many of my pricey colored pencils found themselves ground down to nubs as I attempted to achieve a fine point. That is until this past Christmas. 

As I was purchasing some replacement pencils at Hobby Lobby I spied a small battery operated pencil sharpener. It was the perfect size to fit in my end table drawer along with my coloring books and pencils. 

I must say that each time I use it, and hear the whir of the motor I’m filled with glee. I mean literally I can’t get the grin off my face.  I am loving this little $5.00 purchase, and my coloring has been elevated to a whole new level!

Coffee Frother

 A few weeks before Christmas I got together with my sisters for lunch. We met at my sister Joan’s new house, and she offered us some coffee while we visited. 

My sister Jean asked her if she had a coffee frother. Joan replied she did not, and Jean went on to tell us how much she loved hers. 

I had never really ever considered getting a frother, but about a week later I was at Walmart, and they had a display of frother on an end cap. I think they were about five dollars so I picked one up. 

I must say that I have thoroughly enjoyed frothing my coffee. After adding my creamer I quickly whip it up, and I’m whisked away to a cool coffee shop somewhere!

They say it’s the little things that make the difference in life. Who knew it would be a coffee frother! Thanks Jean!